Loss doesn't mean lost.
Happy kissy-kissy, smoochy-smoochy, and all things gushy month!
This blog entry will be relatively short compared to previous months. It will be a little more transparent, too.
Over the last couple of months, I have been working through feelings of loss. Those of you who may know me well know that I don’t like feelings or feeling feelings. I don’t like the feeling of feeling feelings or feeling that feeling feelings makes me feel like I have feelings. For me, feeling too many feelings gets in the way of thinking clearly and logically.
I know that my thinking isn’t logically true or healthy, but, as I said, I am being a little more transparent.
Just like everyone else in the world, I have had a lot of loss in my life.
Parents, In-laws, close family members, and friends who are no longer with us have been on my mind, and I have felt their loss during the past couple of months. I don’t like feeling, but I have allowed myself to feel a little.
Psssst…I still don’t like it.
Normally, I use music and the act of playing trumpet to help me through my times of “feels”, but I now have a work schedule that differs from week to week, we have moved to a different area, and I have not pursued any leads on playing in bands. Even though I would love to have my retirement career consist of playing and teaching trumpet, I still have to take care of my family and set my dream aside. My job at Universal Studios is a blast, and I feel blessed to work there and plan on working there until they say I am too old.
But I need to find a balance in my schedule to practice and play my horn. I love playing music and helping people forget about the worries of life for a little while.
Music is difficult to define.
The feeling of playing music is nearly impossible to explain to those who do not play or sing.
However, we all experience music in our own way, and it helps us with life, alongside living life, and through all of life’s ups and downs. I would be remiss if I didn’t say that music is not the answer to a fulfilling life. There is only one way to have a fulfilling life, and that is through accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.
While we are still traversing this earth and shuffling our way through the masses of people, we still have to figure out how to handle loss.
So, to end this month’s short blog post, I would like to share a video from Blast. The name of the tune is “Loss”.
The incredible trumpet player Ben Harloff is lowered from the catwalks on the stage while standing on a chair. While being lowered, he is playing a full and haunting solo, flawlessly.
Enjoy the music and be sure to check on one another, encourage each other, and please be kind.